death

today work was terrible...everytime i tio ic why alot things happen. table 56 make noise...84 scold me..like wtf..tootally dimoralise...didnt go to plaza after work as most of them went to drink...went to carson house play game..weijian brought his guitar along too..wow he is good with his guitar..nice..

i still have a immature heart...like ppl maybe younger than me..but they are really good in something and really working on it..this saddens me cos when i look at myself...what do i have...wat makes me me...i dunno alot things...i dun speak well i dun look good i have no talent...seriously wat do i have in me...and are my friends trying to fu yan me...sometimes im totally forgotten by everyone...not that im demanding for it to happen..its just to conclude that you forgot my existence...others get what they didnt expect...i didnt get what i wished for.....im so confused...and now christmas is coming and my christmas wish is stil far within my reach...he is so confuse and vexed!

family- when i see my friends home although their house abit messy..but they have a loving family...like always go shooping together...dinner together outside kopitiam..genting trip..and when i compare mine..its abit sad cos i dun even have any family outing...im so envious of my friends family..

talking about work...suddenly feel im such a fool...everytime need ppl work and ask me can work anot i alway agree without thinking...and most of the time the day when i agree to work always alot bad customer...i agree to work cos i always love to see my friends working with me and also seeing customers having a smile when i serve them..but the sucky part is there is totally no welfare and totally budget...thinking of it is like why im still working in this place...

if anyone dun understand anything posted above dun bother asking me..feeling so doown

ok back to sleep..working at 6 later...hope can wakeup

if only someone can understand how im feeling now