went down to hospital with mummy today see father..lol..he keep asking my mother operation pain anot...in the end confirm the op is at 6pm..dunnoe end at wat time..gotta work later..hope its fun..

guess i will stay up tonight to finnish my sar21..

opennet.com.sg check it out!

dam..why like tat..hais

skipping school tml..father going operation but dunno wat time...im so scared even though its not me going for operation...hais..why this year so suay?!

pls help pray for my father though its a small operation..i dun want anything bad to happen

this morning went to sim lim get components for project again..dam tired and sian by the weather..then back to school do lab then go home...

sian i wanted to start doing sar21 tonight but bad news came =( why 1st month of 2010 so many bad news

had a small class test today..nothing much...school now is like a routine..only left projects to submit..and im not scare..why...next week is feb..guess is the end of the 1st month of 2010 huh..

sar21 final report deadline is this week and i haven even touch on it since the last time i touch it...after tat is big exams and i haven revised anything..i need to buck up!!

im so in love with avatar...the images are still fresh in my mind..i wanna watch it again..who wanna?

Today like whole day pon school..had lunch at amk hawker with soon and his class..after all went to LAN except me and soon lol..thanks man...play play play till 2pm then go home since I not in the mood to do anything..

I'm so confused..at the edge of darkness

mum just came in and give small 1 to 1 talk...she cried while talking to me...im feel i have seriously neglected her since i start working at bliss...everyday after work go plaza pool l4d..she told me for every hour she will look at the clock and see i am back anot..this few months i have been home late and she didnt sleep very well...i feel very awfull..she has a illness for more than 10 years and still struggling to take care of me...i want to show her tat im a grown up boy but i think im doing it the wrong way..im very scared by the words my mum told me...not threatening me but i feel theres something big going on and she dun want me to know..im so scared...i have been a bad boy for so long and i didnt realise it...why why why

work last night was fun.. work at 3pm with weijian..time pass slow and fast..l4d and pooll...yea..l4d no mood keep losing..but pool i win alot llol!! then makan breakfast with carson..slack and book avatar 3d at 3pm online lol...

woke up at 2pm..omg carson thanks man lol...call me 35 times still no wake up come up my house knock my window then i wake up...rush to ehub...dam nice though i watch avatar 2nd time..couple seat again lol!!

then back to 401 makan as carson got work...after tat slack awhile with zhiyin then go home le...

im super tired..my eyes are dry my skin is dry my backache my heart problem...wat more can come.i wish time could just stop for a moment...

today work was ok..no trouble at all...after work l4d with kon...and pool awhile..standard...now back home wash clothes cos working at 3 later...hope i dun die later on..

cny is coming..but i dun have any mood looking forward to it...i think its going to boring cny this year...nothing but work..sooo turn off...and somemore its valentines'...blah...

army daze coming.

something the book doesnt teach

ytd appointment was the first to reach...and guess wat...dam i got refer to cardiologist specialist at alexander hospital...dame sad...why 2 time checkup still like tat...the doc keep asking my got shortness of breathe breathing difficulty anot...i feel dun have lei...or is this heart problem that has develop long ago but i didnt realise it..abit scare la..

ytd work very little ppl...dam bored...super busy around 9+...some many customer run here and there..forget it..slack at 401 with amanda and gang..talk talk then go home..

just woke up..decided to skip school la..go there also do nothing..working at 7 later cya ya all later

wed as usual...school ends very fast..nothing much happen in school..late for lecture..yea..after that went home as nothing is on...

tml is checkup again...820 appointment..6am need wake up..7am go...hope pray hard just go straight to that station cos i dun want repeat whole checkup again..so tiring...and hope got time go back school then go to work..chiong here and there so tired..

teamwork~ the weak also can be strong

dunno why i have been eating alot...these few days i eat 2 rounds for lunch...maybe im hungry...and also...i suddenly have a crave for chocolate..bought 3 packet of chocolate and hide them in my room...eating chocolate really brightens up my mood

today skip last 2 lessons and went to sim lim to buy components for our project..then we tour around sim lim square..omg..its been such a long time i went back..ALOT nice stuff to look at...and also very tempting to buy..want this and that...

then after that we went to bugis street walk walk and also the shopping mall...wanted to buy a new wallet since mine is chui...went to topman and walletshop...saw both wallet i like alot..so didnt buy..

but i bought a NEW everlast shoes! hope it will last cos i super love it when i look at it..pain..money fly alot today..

today although was a short shopping trip..it lightens my mood..thanks ppl for bringing me out..hope there will be more of this next time...dun ask me why so random but i also realise it take a lifetime to earn money but takes 1 wrong move to lose all the money u earn in your lifetime...just suddenly thought of it..

yea..like soon said "good friends are not easy to find, so please keep them at ur side" friends like u are hard to find...i hope we all can be back to normal...after some time..

caught avatar ytd..like finally..omg tell u super dam nice..i wanna watch again..feel my breathing feel the heartbeat...tell me wat to do and fly...omg...so inspiring..its a thumbs up movie..10/10!

pool with soon just now and a little bit of talking...thanks man..

when a heart is shattered...it always takes time to put back the pieces

i hope everyone will be fine..times are hard..dun let small little issues worsen relations..we have been thru so much..its not the matter of whos at fault..its always begins with urself..i know i have no rights to say anything..but this is wat i think...

i need to wake up..someone come save me..i need a hero..im stuck in this endless dream...

its all for nothing

vs qualité, la quantité de travail d'aujourd'hui ... Était-ce ... plus de personnel nouveau qui ne sais pas comment faire contre le travail des employés moins anciens qui savent faire ... wat abandonner ..

après slack travail au terrain de jeu attendu pour bientôt à venir .. jure que ce n'était barrage putain je tremblais de froid à l'intérieur .. vent si froid et fort ... après tat dirigés vers ppool plaaza avec JALEX ... OMG hes so très pro .. qualifiés .. puis L4D avec Kon .. constants que nous jeu très rapide lol 1,6 $ seulement

après slack tat au Kopitiam hors terrain de jeu jusqu'à maintenant venu ensuite à la maison .. super froid fatigué .. im faibles perdre trop de chaleur .. Je pense que je vais brûler et bientôt mourir ... J'ai besoin d'un peu de soleil et de chaleur dans ma vie

wat de le faire .. i dono .. personne ne peut me guider .. seulement moi marchant au hasard

wentt to blood donation with carson this morning...dam sad lo...i cant donate cos they got my record in their database say need at least 3 months in order to donate again...then i only see carson donate..lol..his virgin blood donation..like nothing only...then went to subway at hougang mall..saw amanda..then weijian rena join in later...bought a present for stella...sorry cant go ur party..not say cant..i want to work tats all...bought katrina a present too! shh..and yea..finally i caught someone pei me watch avatar 3d...also katrina...tml siol..then also can shun bian celebrate her bday...

ok...i feel so shag weak now..i need something to alert me!

Ok a proper post..last night after work pool till 530 then go home..blogging half way then fall asleep..Carson still haven call me!! I think he back to sleep already..

Super headache now..I don't know wat to do later..

K avatar tml with Katrina! Like finally yea!

today work was totally pissed..starting abit slack...got new comer andrew...was assign to guide him..lol..but i dunno how sia..then went neear to closing got 1 table 81 5 flipino dam dulan...jalex almost want to fight them...i dam scare sia...we closing deck area le..this idoit drunk or wat...say pay 500$ more can sit at deck till 4am plus anot...plus he scold alot ppl fuck..wat kind of fucking attitude is this..fuck off..yea..he think he flipino head come singapore very big...sorry hor...ji tao si singapore...dam fucker...the scenerio tense until cindy came out to talk..alot ppl watching..i scare if really fight wat to do..why so many suker customers recently..

ok blood donation later!

Didn't really sleep last night...was doing hf quiz..and failed..sad later gonna try again..now that feeling is back again..like sick siol..k going to school nows

today whole day feeling unwell...whole bodyache..feel like my whole body tearing itself apart...very unconfortable...HF quiz still not yet done..next week sar21 final submission...good luck to me..

i feel like vomitting aagain

woke up quite early today as i went to sleep at 830 last night lol

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/cb_haiti_earthquake

dame..a brand new start of 2010 and the worst earthquake record ever over 200 years...sad..news said 500000 ppl could be dead..wttf worst than the tsunami last time...god bless

i feel so sick now...flu...toothache lol...headache...wat more can happen to me..

and ya..ytd just receieved exam timetable...22feb first paper..1st and 3d march 2 more paper..then woohoo!! graduate liao...1 more month to prepare lo..super fast..after CNY somemore..CNY need to study le...though 3 modules only...the content is like 6 modules lo...theory itself is a killer already...

ok...shall stop now..going to skool

school was a totall epic bored today...no mood for anyting...didnt watch avatar as most of everyone i ask all busy...wanted to go watch alone but like emo luh...next week see how...

im so tired...realy need a deep long sleep..put me away from outside life...

Last night start work at 8...super boring..stupid customer think he big big come here vent his anger on yulin..business ppl somemore..shameless lowdown ppl..dun ever come back fuckers

I so wanna skip school today as I have no mood for anything..just want a good long sleep

today later release at 3 who wanna join me watch avatar later at 545pm at amk hub?

ytd lesson ended early..for the first time..lol..wanted to go play l4d or pool...but everyone not in the mood so nvm..was feeling unwell also ytd..the sick mood is coming....im so cold...went back home ytd slept at 4pm sleep until 7am wake up...very refresh now...but the sick mood is still there..

ok..today later is my group to interview others hahaha..time to revenge..lol jk...working at 8pm today..got alot time to go home eat bath...okok..time to prepare to iron my shirt now..

Work was ok just now...deck is god dam busy...so many big groups..at least 4 groups...help them out abit...wine trainig course before tat was ok..learnt something new...

This week working Tuesday..sian...but got fun ppl pei so ok..dam wat bliss policy lol

just now release at 10..slack and waited for them to release...pool with Carson and kon...left4dead after that..thanks guys pei me pass thru this hard times..I really need to go out more

a few more months and I graduated..I hope to invite my friends to my graduation and also a BIG gathering or say dinner together..I hope

wed movie anyone?? Avatar preferbaly

something worth dying for

First cut is the deepest

Working this 2 days although tired but fun...Friday after work l4d..and jalex come play lol..fun siol..and finally sleep from 8 am all the way to 5pm..cannot make it to work..start work at 7...work today was ok..time pass quite fast...do alot lighting deco for deck and bar..dam tired but fun...dam steady..before 2am settle everythng le..after all come drink at my house down stairs..dam giddy siol..but I tell u..I'm wanna drink cos I'm happy....and i thought we cant finish the whole bottle of chivas but in the end finish lol..then i also abit seng seng...drinking with friends have never been so fun..

edit: now headache siol!

and yea..jailbroken my ipod..power sia..can download ALOT free games and cool themes

And hell yeA..I found a super dam nice song that describe wat I feel now..super dam love it..

Ok later going for the wine training later at 4...hope I can wake up later siol!!

so pissed off during work..all u care is break break break..so busy already i need run here run there dam piss...really want shout fuck off in ur face..nabei dumbfuck never do own stuff still want come do my stuff...omg...im cursed so many times..dun care...work is work..outside life is outside life..after work i cool down abit le..

spend whole night doing presentation...and abit of jailbreaking my ipod...so mafan!..i do do do until so engross then now forgot to continue do presentation..nice..now super headache.....i think i pon human factor later...so tired..

i think i have sore throat now..lol..out of no where kena..and i never anyhow eat lei..how siol..

weekend gonna be fun..i hope..l4d with kun..slacking with friends after work..

Ytd school was super tired even though ended at 3..after that rush Finnish the fire protrcion project..was super sleepy...wanted to watch avatar at night but no one is free or has watched it already...sian so go home

woke up automatically this few days without alarm clock..miracle lol

fml I hate it when i'm mood changes from hot and cold...

we all have to go through everything in life , at least once

there is a potential in everyone...just waiting to be found/discovered..what i learnt today - believe in yourself..never regret wat u do...theres a reason in everything in life

someone told me today - i need a direction or a compass in life

today interview sort of kena shoot but really hit me so hard...i think i come to a point i woke up..so many things happened recently i have no mood to do anyting..teacher can see it...i thought i was going to totally flung the whole interview cos i waas really talking cock..and everyone was well prepared..teacher said something really set me thinking...i dun see why everyone say im good...i dun see the good in me..most of the time i see good in everyone..i think i should change my tinkings

i think im a person who need solid facts, fomulas in life...like i love to get things straight to the point..follow rules..get wat i mean? what do u ppl think of me...tag pls ppl..be true pls

released early from school today..schoolmates jio go l4d then movie...then 1 minute later jeolyn jio wanna come out slack anot..but i aggreeed to scoolmates first..sorry man..thanks for all this small little things that made it feel im there

finally..watch a movie in 2010!..wanted to catch avatar but everyone watch it ald..watched bodyguards and assasin..omg so nice..made me wanna know wat happen after sun yat sen left...china has come a long way indeed...blood paved revolution...

ok gonna sleep..peanuts and heinken not bad eh..

Payday last night was awesome...earn quite alot this month...and ya...another amount added on to my last 2months savings..abit happy

I'm abit happy things starting to go back to normal..I will try to be normal at normal times..ppl said I need to be normal in order for others to treat me normally..sorry to all who have to put up with my attitude past few days..I will be normal

ok interview later... All da best for me

do u really read

first day back in school..totally sian cos alot things need to be done by this week! and tml have a mock interview at 10am..and my group is the first to be interviewed..one by one!..and i have not prepared anything...how am i suppose to die tml...god bless..

im so super headache now...didnt sleep for so long...cant see properly...very hungry...hurted emotionally...hope one of these problem will fade away this week...

ok...gona collect my pay later if i have the time...iron shirt and read up abit naos

Dam it...had a dam epic scary nightmare just now...I'm so scared cos I still remember who are in the nightmare...so real till I jump up off my bed...now I'm awake...and sleep for like 2hours only...

Ok Nuff said...back to sleep

Dnner at bliss just now..lol alot ppl sia...all expecting to get pay but in the end didn't...after tat Milo bing at 401..send Joshua home..pool 1 round with xianglong then now home..

借酒xiao愁，愁更愁.
I promise I won't drink to forget those unhappy stuff..it will still be the same after I wake up
now..let time heal

Slept until now then wake up...standard..later 8pm meeting xianglong for dinner..last day of holidays is only a few hours..I wish time could slow down now lol

watching spiderman abit...although they keep repeating the movie for like countless times...everytime I watch it..I feel like I need a hero in my life...or I could be a hero..that way my life will b totally different from wat my life is now

didnt sleep...got ah soon pei me stay up the night as he didnt have the key to go home...now he is sleeping sound at my room...bored...reading my old post for 2009...thinking alot about the past...yes..those are part of me..remeber those good days ppl...forget those bad days..im sorry if i made anyone a bad start of 2010...

thinking of schooling next week i think i will die terribly...tueday interview and nothing is done yet...friday sar21 and fire protection report...yea..most of us are still in the party mode...we are so dead lol...

last week xmas party steamboat and this week countdown was very fun...thanks everyone who made it possible...jalex esp...he did most of the deco all this..we got help of course...i will always enjoy having a captain like him...

sleeping time!~

I guess I have to let it all out...working just now was fucking dulan...shi Han should have just stab me with the knife in kitchen back then..ok at first work was abit sian...eugene call me go wipe wine... Wipe wipe till 10pm come out chiong none stop..worst still send alot ppl home...and I can't evn see properly in outdoor and it's always me walkig arond..not like I dun want to fix my specs...just no time..totally no appitie no mood for anything..put salt on my wounds..ok nvm lo

these 2 days working w/o specs although abit troublesome..but i also like...cos i dun need see how ppl look at me...just be myself..dun care..i think i will stick to this for the moment...

sometimes face problem matters alot...I been thinking alot..it's just when I want attention, no one care about me..I appreciate all those who really see thru my problem recently..that is because the problem is obvious and serious..during those normal times...I think I better be a loner

wat i want to say..ppl should jio me out more often

bad start of a new year...dun blame me for being so vulgar..now I dun care...since I can't talk well in real life..I still have here to say wat exactly I feel

Past 2 days working was fun...working with my favourite ppl at same place I like! Countdown was totally fun plus chaotic lol..some random but very kind customer gave me a burbon coke to drink..steady him...thanks man..I hope 2010 will be a better year for all my friends...

Specs spoiled dam it...today working having hard time keeping a lookout for customer calling me and clear table..but I have managed lol..just now even play l4d somemore lol..see how later can go fix anot

I'm so excited plus nervous about the coming months..in about 2 to 3 months I'm gonna get my diploma like after 3 years of poly..meaning the coming exam is my final and most important one...fear is one thing..when can I overcome it..after my exams..I hope the day I get my diploma..I hope I can invite my friends to celebrate with me..that will be so cool lol..I can't wait man..

I have saved 600$ in 2 months..great now gonna wait next pay then top up my acc

sorry to all I caused trouble these few days..I have made alot great friends worry for me..thanks for standing by me...thanks for all the talking u all gave despite I was unwilling to listen...it's time to stand up.. I will not lett all my best friends down.. Next time we drink I will not let it happen again..I said it u heard it..I want everything to be back like the way it was...u have my words people

ive learnt...

these few days alot things happen..tired..i need a pause button..its my fault..i cant control myself..im sorry

just realised this is my last xmas and new year celebration with my friends...next year i will be in army...how sad

edit: long post...take some break in between when u read

finally...2009 is coming to an end..this year is a year full of happenings..h1n1..dam scare to go out..death of mj...too sudden..though im not a great fan of him..but i think he is still king of pop...hes a legacy now..firstly school...reached year3..tio FYP and IAP...3 months...made alot new friends in FYP...FYP at first thnking is a total waste of time..but also got some use...during presentation..tio shoot until very jialat...but it makes u thinking..and thanks mr gui mr lim mr phua wanxi xueqi for accompanying me thru the fyp...yea...suzhou trip..definitely love that trip...suzhou clique..gonna miss ya..IAP..learnt tat life is harder than expected in the working world...gotta enjoy wat i have now...3 months in IAP..though short...i saw alot things that the book doesnt teach...2months break..got back to work...august was just a norm month..nothing special...sept was a eventful month...october...back to school...study path...forgot almost wat i learnt in year 2..abit lost and scared...but slowly getting back on my feet to study...last sem..cant waste it

work...alot changes to bliss this year...old staffs one by one leave..new staff come and go...jit and gopal..the bestest sup can crap and talk with...abit off the clique when i came back from suzhou and my IAP...slowly gettin back...had made some good friends there...wont forget them...they are the most active ppl in my life..steady ppl...life never be the same without them...maybe its something call friends are for life...though im always left out at times..i still feel some bit of love from my friends..i dun ask for more..i just want it to come from the inside..tats all....thanks my lovely friends

wat i have achieve this year...quite alot stuff..beside school and attachment..i also learnt abit of pool..lol..also learnt to drink lol..once in awhile ok..but dun everyday drink can le...i dyed my hair for the first time...i learnt abit of poker card games but still lousy..i learnt to stay up the night..lol...got myself a present to myself with my own pay..donated blood for the first time...travel to suzhou w/o family..experience the feeling of worry/fear..experience the pain of losing someone...had a gathering with everyone i like...i think theres more..but i forgot..watever it is..its in my blood now

below are some delications to those who had a small impact /impact to me in 2009 (not in order!)

mr peter lim - the best fyp supervisor u can find...which supervisor is so good tat he stay back after 6pm and run around blk s to find a battery holder and ic for you..and he even helps me to pack the 2 sets of circuit board for me because im flying off to suzhou the next day..im so touched by him...he also gave some good advices to my personal problems by telling me his story..thank you mr lim

mr gui - the stern fyp manager of mine...everytime shoot ppl during presentation until no words to say..but i think he pointed out alot points that i should learn...yea...in life there are 5 F's u are afraid of..future friends family finance (last one forget)..he said tat to me when it was the last day of fyp and i told him im afraid of IAP...at least it did some help to console me..thanks mr gui

wanxi - 1 of the DT during my fyp..very helpfull and funny and crappy...like the sun in the cold lab...very random at times...she is very cute...and super random like shouting in lab and playing restaurant city..lol

xueqi - the other DT in my fyp..looks fierce..but actually not..lol..also say lao niang..hahah..she is very nice...always give us warning...like director walking around tell us alt-tab...then got function also kapo some food for us to eat...she knows when to be nice and when to be serious...tats her good point..

sean - fyp lab mate...at first didnt really like him cos my lab only got sing nee me and him..then i was like wtf...3 months with them..lol..but then as time goes..i find out that he is actually quite a nice guy..'see and help' i would say...he can put down watever he is doing and try to help u even though he is not very sure how to help...then the best part is he also goes to suzhou with me..along with sing nee...i was dam happy cos it is fate tat we have met...at suzhou...though we really didnt do anything for our fyp project..i realised from him tat real friends dun need to say a word and they will know wat u are thinking...he helped me alot with my troubles in suzhou...together with safwan...making me feel like i have another brother...for this..i thank you sean

sing nee - the boom box in my fyp...very noisy..ok..but also very helpful..lol..she also went to suzhou with me...like the topic starter in the clique..w/o her is like abit quiet..best buddy during fyp cos im abit emo during fyp and had no one to talk to..thanks singnee

jiawei - long story to say...during year1..i was abit of a loner in class..cos deshun their clique together with jiawei..then i with raihan they all..then slowly to year 2 some problems in their clique and i see him abit sad so go join him...then i find him actually a observane guy..but too much already..and like to point out everyone mistake..but too much also..maybe tats his bad point..but during the last semster comm skill presentation...practically its my fault cos i didnt do my part in the report and he did everything himself..and we screw up the whole presentation cos everyone not working together well..teacher ask us why like tat he take on the responsiblility on himself..i feel abit remorse...so from tat day...i will try to keep my commitments well...tats why i learn..thanks jiawei

celestine - best buddy at work...always clear rubbish bin together...working at outdoor tat time..only need 3 staff can cover already...always alot story to say...and give advices..he now in ns...take care brother

soon - also best buddy at work...talk cock joke see girl..lululu~ haha..steady brother..heart to heart talk once in awhile..XGJH hahah...great pool buddy...dun smoke so much in 2010 ya..take care brother

jit - best supervisor u can get...staff welfare no.1 always cover us when got guailan customer..handicap toliet haha..face looks fierce ...but he dam friendly and can talk crap de...always good to have him around..sad thing he quited bliss on his own..its their lost to lose sucha power dam capable supervisor...happy new year mr jit!

gopal - after jit left..gopal became the supervisor..weallhategopal.com yea..dunnoe who sial..lol jk..at first dun like him cos he too tall and talks funny...but perhaps we slowly open up to him tats why he is so close to us after tat...he drinks beer to grow tat tall..lol..had alot fun with him..killing zombies after work..haha so funny him...heal me!! lol..why i die!! LOL! okay..then he also quited bliss..and worked somewhere else..i feel happy for him cos the place he working at has a much better pay than bliss for a full timer...but sad that no one can crap with during work..anyways..happy new year mr gopal!

jeolyn - the ctrl x ctrl v smile girl...dam cute she..alot of looks...english also dam good..always suan ppl wrong prounciation..cakeee ah...not cake.. she has alot funny hand signs..yea..all her idea...and also alot slang...haha..idea siol...always had alot fun working with her...never fail to put a smile on everyone face...thanks for everything u have done jeolyn...yes...u know it..thanks..and dun smoke too much ah..it spoils ur image

rena - ahahah..the skinnest girl in bliss..she alot funny idea also...likes to disturb ppl during work..she is a very thoughtful girl..always put others before herself...not a good liar..can easily see when she telling a lie..lol..rena..try be more adventurous this year k? happy new year may ur dreams come true in 2010 girl!

layyen - nice girl at bliss also..have a man voice when sore throat LOL! she thinks maturely...tats what i admire of her...work has been very fun with her around..playing games when very slack...talk jokes and PlAY WAX YA LOL! dam funny she...one of the few seniors of bliss when i first came in..i salute to all of u...happy new year! and also dun smoke so much ah hahaha

kon - the chef of bliss...i respect him cos he is a steady guy..wont count a penny by penny..had alot fun with him and the rest after work..pooling l4d..hes the best teammate with me..we can clear the map with 6 infected player with only 2 of us as survivors...steady right haha...happy new year! hope more fun will come in time

katrina - help me alot thru my hardest time during FYP and IAP...i can say she is a very rare gem to be found...though age diffence is big..but we still manage to put aside all these small little things and have fun...xiayutian continue-r...i respect u as a friend who im very lucky to find...cheers! happy new year and good luck to ur work in 2010!

naren - steadyy brother..good to have him around cos hes big and strong! just wanna say im lucky to have u as a buddy at work..lets hope friends forever buddy! cheeers!

amanda - gaave alot advices during my downest part of my life...really gave me a wakeup call with the help of others..she is a very nice girl...happy new year! dun smoke so much ah


and not to forget those who signed on the card when i left for suzhou!..it really touch my heart till this day cos no one has ever done someting special for me ever till tat day...tears just flow down when im in the plane when i open up the card...its the first time im recognised by everyone...i love u ppl..thanks for everything

lastly..thanks for all the outing organise this year..hope we can have more next year!


my new years resolution? 2010 is going to be a turning point year for me...graduation from nyp...hope ppl can celebrate for me..gonna miss those times in poly..3 years in a blink...ns...time to be a man...hopefully after ns...i will be more matured to see the world in front of me...besides tat..i also wish to have more new friends and also have a even better friendship with all my friends...more outings i hope to come in 2010...but pls before the time i go in ns lol...wat i have done wrong in 2009 is i was stuck in a vicious cycle over and over again..i need to get out and play

let us put bygones/hatred/guilt behind us k? 2010 gonna be a better year

dun cry because its over...smile because it happen..cheer up..


thanks all my friends and have a happy new year..may ur 2010 be a year full of hope and opportunity

hope u all will still be reading my blog in the future..thanks ya

thanks for being a part of me everyone!

enjoy ur countdown party tonight! those working later...hope we will have fun during and after work later!!! im so going to miss u all

steamboat was a success..thanks all who arrived on time...and thanks to those who pei me go market early in the morning! u know who u are...its a season of giving..i think its time..as long as everyone is happy..i will die with no regrets cos my existence is remembered by everyone...

pool at plaza as usual...dam cui...later working at 6...i need some sleep..

im so confused...wtf im doing...please help me

last night food runner with rena..total slack lol...after tat late crowd came in...dam cui..dun wana say..after tat pooled..then rena amanda marilyn weijian xianglong come my house wait till morning pei me go market buy ingredients...thanks ppl!! i love u..so steady pei me...after tat makan breakfast at my house..then 1 by 1 all down...lol..helped my mum pack the cutted fish meat all these...later they will come again help me out cook the egg and cut veggie! i super like!

now im home alone...time to blast some music...

tonight! i hope it goes well...hopefully

listen to me

ytd double pay work was de best lol...help jalex do the new year lighting from 8 to 1..power lol..sibei slack...after that camwhore abit again..lol..makan at 401..drink abit till 4..then pool awhile at plaza..then send jeolyn home then home...

tml morning going to hougang green market buy those stuff for steamboat..i need some guys and girls help..who can?

你總是心太軟心太軟
把所有問題都自己扛
相愛總是簡單相處太難
不是你的就別再勉強

Forever Love Forever Love
我只想用我這一輩子去愛你
從今以後
你會是所有
幸福的理由

today party after work was a super success..drinking session so fun...dam hungry cos ate dinner at 4pm..and tahan till closing...dun care just eat...super fun sia!! i like! do pumping eat chilli..just go only lol..chilli buay tahan supeer hot..tears just came lol..and xiang long...im not drunk k!!

naren!!! peektures on fb pls!!!

thanks to all bliss ppl for this party...you know who you are! ur simply da best!

when i see you
i run out of words to say
girrrrl....

today woke up at 8am...then was like wtf...9am appointment 8am wakeup..chiong down there 930 late...scare they scold me...reach there...omg..alot ppl..saw raihan deshun kangwei...checkup very boring..do this and tat...the last one is test ur iq de..omg..see the com so sian...2 hours..all like common sense qns...anyhow click le..headache buay tahan...then just now go ntuc buy alot drinks...sunday see who wannt ton at my house can drink also....


yea...tml is the night i like!!!

root of all evil

today dinner at just acia was a success...
after that go back plaza pool awhile then go home le..tml need 6am wake up meet 8am at redhill mrt..hope i can reach on time cos morning crowd

im so headache/sad/excited/nervous right now..i cant imagine wat would my army life be..im gonna miss all my lovely friends..i love all of u..it will be like another life...i dun wanna lose my relationship with my friends...i want to spend every precious moment with my friends...i want someone...anyone..give me a big hug...i know its no point fearing it to come cos tat day will still come...just tat im too stubborn to make changes..please god or my dear friends wish me all the best when the time has come..

i actually wanted to do something like this below since the time before i left for suzhou..but now i think its time so i will do it


rena
the legendary bliss banana, a very nice girl but she doesnt knows it. thoughtful good listener fun loving
its always good to have her around likes to disturb ppl big eater and still so skinny 幽灵~~

layyen
the xiaoyanzi.....best combo with rena and jeolyn...l4d kaki...feet can bend 90degree de..just do/go/say only

jeolyn
the cute and cheerful gal...can laugh and joke about anything...best combo with rena...very pretty and good gal..alot of trademark she use...

soon
same blk class workplace buddy..steady brother..paisei keep ps u...happy go lucky

kon
steady brother..got him no need scare anything lol...best l4d kaki..kitchen guy

weijian
good guitar player..alot things can talk with

naren
the bodyguard...steady buddy also..like okaaay LOL

kat
nice girl..though not active in clique but hearts will always be connected...

yea i will add in more in time to come..if i have time...cos so dam busy now..and dam..im hungry again..

just realise i didnt sleep well for the past 1 week..friday and sat after work play till morning sunday go carson house ton monday 3pm work after work alot ppl ton at my house..today..now ton till morning later go checkup....tml maybe drinking with zm..ton alone at home to do some important stuff..thursday friday sat..confirm play till day light..omg..im so cui

xgjh..get me outta here!

Today work time pass very fast...did opening with xianglong..washed fans...do Christmas decor till 6pm plus..thanks jalex for the food..was very tired..but seeing the final master piece I was dam happyand satisfied..working as a team with my friends is so enjoyable..and SORRY JEOLYN please forgive me

After work naren come to my house to do his stuff..then rena and the rest came also lol...play monopoly uno..5am plus all of them went off..only naren left with here talking with me

later going out for dinner at dunnoe where to celebrate jinyu bday..before that I maybe wanna go buy shoe and stuff...maybe lol..

I dun want you to think of me
I just want u to know I'm there for u
Girl you have sucha angel voice
Sing to me again

today woke up at 4...working at 6..so went to 401 makan alone..work was ok..food runner...after tat went to plaza l4d with kon jeolyn eugene carson baoling and modhama(sorry if spell wrong lol)...dam fun play versus..steeady ah lol...now back home..later morning going out to pay respect to ah gong...thinking of it its like time passed so fast..hai wat can i say..

everytime i always look back and keep i look out for you..maybe thats part of me for u already

later working at 3 with xianglong! yes i like lol..hope i dont die later

death

today work was terrible...everytime i tio ic why alot things happen. table 56 make noise...84 scold me..like wtf..tootally dimoralise...didnt go to plaza after work as most of them went to drink...went to carson house play game..weijian brought his guitar along too..wow he is good with his guitar..nice..

i still have a immature heart...like ppl maybe younger than me..but they are really good in something and really working on it..this saddens me cos when i look at myself...what do i have...wat makes me me...i dunno alot things...i dun speak well i dun look good i have no talent...seriously wat do i have in me...and are my friends trying to fu yan me...sometimes im totally forgotten by everyone...not that im demanding for it to happen..its just to conclude that you forgot my existence...others get what they didnt expect...i didnt get what i wished for.....im so confused...and now christmas is coming and my christmas wish is stil far within my reach...he is so confuse and vexed!

family- when i see my friends home although their house abit messy..but they have a loving family...like always go shooping together...dinner together outside kopitiam..genting trip..and when i compare mine..its abit sad cos i dun even have any family outing...im so envious of my friends family..

talking about work...suddenly feel im such a fool...everytime need ppl work and ask me can work anot i alway agree without thinking...and most of the time the day when i agree to work always alot bad customer...i agree to work cos i always love to see my friends working with me and also seeing customers having a smile when i serve them..but the sucky part is there is totally no welfare and totally budget...thinking of it is like why im still working in this place...

if anyone dun understand anything posted above dun bother asking me..feeling so doown

ok back to sleep..working at 6 later...hope can wakeup

if only someone can understand how im feeling now

Ytd went to jeolyn house help her out with her makeover..wah dam luan lol alot things hhaa after that went to hougang maall shop for the 2 J 's present and bliss party de...season of of giving..I like!

Ytd work was super tired..not much crowd but maybe is too long no work...almost die when climb the fence to pit the glass pot on the ceiling at deck... Scary siol..l4d with kon..haha steady 2ppl only...the rest join in later..

Why I feel so helpless

yes!! finally its over! so dam happy..the qns come out also quite easy..lucky those i studied de all come out..heng ah..later 2pm going out to buy presents for the event..

now i need some rest..dam tired to do anthing

あなたが誰なのさ

seng seng seng is wat i can say..2 qns 40 marks cannot play play...essay qns..bobian le..really tired gonna catch some sleep naos..tml 6am need wake up..nights ppl.


this innocence is brillant it makes you wanna cry
this innocence is brillant please dont go away
cos i need you now
and ill hold on to it
dont you let it pass you by

today dam tired...studied all the way till 4pm...kfc paper was ok..but the qns twist until i dunno how to do..hai...dun say le..leave no regrets...

seriously..these few day i studying in library obseved alot students with their attitude to common test...ok..common test only wat...somemore xmas coming...relax la...most of the junior think that way...but when i see my friends studying together....the whole thing changes lo...i dunno how to describe but i know final sem ppl like us really see common test differently from juniors..

lol..last night had a dam best dream...i dreamt i got married to my tuition teacher ok random...dam funny lo....so real...but its only a dream..dun think so much..

tml last paper!! im so dam happy!! and also alot things coming in...buy alot stuffs...works...pool! so excited!


tonight soon they all gonna ton at serangoon mac study yapp...should i go or rest well for tml paper?

girl i love ur beautiful soul

爱你就等于爱自己

today alot of "enlightenment" studying ah yap module..despite those noisy year1 students in library making alot of noise...thanks to my dearest ipod touch..lol...yea..studyed finnish the formulas..left theory to understand...but tml is kfc..so gonna study kfc tml morning then ah yap theory at night..nothing much..ciaos..

i have always been serious girl.

Finished studying some of ah yap module with soon...actually not hard..all is just formula..just need to understand and when to apply the formula..I'm so motivated to study!! But also need to get some sleep..ok bye earthlings

yes I'm a thinker

today study ALOT of kfc de chap...almost everything..dam shag eyes..brain dead..hope i wont forget wat i learn today cos tml going to study ah yap de module..pray pray

yea..dam tired nao...gonna sleep early


I'm just a little old-fashioned
It takes more than a physical attraction
My initial reaction is
Honey give me a love
Not a fascimile of

Don't love me for fun, girl
Let me be the one, girl
Love Me For a Reason
Let the reason be love

i must change for the better

today manage to wake up early and go to school to study...argh...study till headache...the paper was easier than expected...yea...but like heavy weightage lei...ask simple qns 5marks...left early as i dun want to listen noise..

tml going back to school again to study navigation and maybe some of ah yap...hope i wont die...

face problem..thats why..IDGAF

end of year is coming...2010 is just a few days away...wat have i done..or achieve this year...time to write down what i have not done and put it to next year's resolution

and ya...27 dec i wanna have a steamboat..hope this time can organise...make urself free pls! its a sunday!

heres something to those* who dont have something call FACEBOOK to watch...confirm will say lol haha/lame lor! LOL!

gl

today outing was dam fun! this is someting money cant buy..as long as everyone is happy today that moment...even if the sky drops down...argh..u know wat i want to say...u guys are awesome! so long never like tat liao..hope will have another outing like this in future

back to myself i totally sianed after bowling session cos everytime i think of tml common test really scares me...its like going to the exam hall with only lets say 40% knowledge of the module...im really scared...all i need today was someone to look me in the eye and tell me everything will be fine...

It just keeps running in my mind..and I have no control of it

argh..god bless u me everyone for tml

sometimes love comes around
and it knocks you down
JUST get back up when it knocks you down

boom boom shake shake

today studyed in school..yea..finally browse thru and have a small idea of the qns..but haven practice cos no past year common test paper..sad...leave scool around 6pm..then home maken then come out study again with soon at rivervale mac til 10+..head down to bliss..soon left first..waited for amanda to fan gong..went to plaza pool..yea...so fun today..pool till 530+ then homed...

later meeting at hougang interchange..who late treat bubble tea ya?..i think i will late lol..

do i look like an idoit?
in times of crsis and i still got mood to play, shopping
people say i have no sense of urgency
but when i get serious, i will be dam serious
i think im too serious all the time
time to give myself a break seriously

things i dun want u to know
cos ur just so pure

today work at deck...i totally dun like..so shitty..told them to walk around clear plate...stay at ur station..must do setting...so many timeS!..buay lun ah!..best lo..all guys at deck...no one entertain me...all my fav ppl working outside...sian..

alot unhappythings happen...totally turn off...i dun want say..shall forget it...wait the impact come then see how...

jus back from plaza...l4d2 with kun and carson.!!! steady ah!!..we play so fast..complete 2 map and never die...just chiong only..lol..

later 11pm meeting at school with friends to study books..hope i can absorb alot later..gonna catch some sleep now


No one ever saw me like you do
All the things that I could add up too
I never knew just what a smile was worth
But your eyes see everything without a single word

Cause there's something in the way you look at me
It's as if my heart knows you're the missing piece
You make me believe that there's nothing in this world I can't be
I never know what you see
But there's somethin' in the way you look at me

no im not emo..just the lyrics so nice

today didnt went to school eearly to study...was so dam tired decided to sleep all the way...normal day in school..yea..alot common test tips..didnt stay in school to study...

and omg lol..just now on my way home when crossing the road..i see green traffic light as green pedastrain light...i cross the road without knowing and almost got hit by car...how stupid can i get!

weekends here..sort of looking forward cos gonna work study play...yea...study whole day on sat..working on friday...bowling! on sunday!

ok..gonna touch abit on 3350 bye!

revision for common test is still the same...alot dun seem to understand..and i haven even touch on the monday's paper yet...god bless..these fews days studying alot in school...cannot tahan so much noise...home is the best choice if i want to be alone..tml lesson start at 1pm..go school early study then go or lesson..

im hungry AGAIN!

yea..the world suddenly looks so beautiful...i have been walking too fast to notice my surrounding..maybe i should slow down and enjoy the scenery

quoted from FB: put walls around me not to isolate myself, but to see who care enough to break them down

fucking hell...i hate it when ppl say scared exam test and their quiz marks got higher than mine...super duper pissed today..cant stand it...fuck it...give me a break

yea leave me alone...i suck

yea...fell asleep at 11am...cannot tahan...wokeup at 230pm..realise im late for the study....rush down to school..lucky i was the 3rd to reach...didnt study anything...only did my cover letter for comm skills...dam im so scared...when i see my friends studying...i dun even understand a single thing they are saying...for the first time i feel so scared of papers...someone please PUSH MOI! pls!

then after studying...we decide to go to bliss eat cheese fondue...and yes! so salty...very thirsty..drink hoegaarden and some funny drinks..now back home...

guys guys gals gals..blah blah blah

work on the friday was shitty man...best group of outdoor staff...dun wanna say..totally cui..but take pay le..so everything i dun care lol...after work..l4d2 with alot ppl!...best versus mode...so fun lol...then play campaign...bei steady ah!!! llol..die alot times..cos bei steady ah lol!! jkjk..



i like this pic so much...so cute!

and hello rena..i no tou lan ok..just wanna join in the fun

today work was ok..work in deck with layyen..starting sibei sian..came up with alot funny games...drawing game...ni wo ta game..lol...amanda lose the forfeit...me got a free bak chow mee thanks!! haha...and i dun like new staff..just dun like...head to plaza pool..l4d2...now back home

later 2pm gonna meet chow shin and others at amk hub to study..hope i dun sleep now...and i want to buy new shoes and do the go card!!

finally happy bday jalex! dun fall sick k!

deeper and deeper

today work was tiring..run here and there..lack of staff...finally closed..makan at 401 then homed..hope later i can wake up at 9am..or 10..i dun want to pon class anymore!

sian...common test coming...report on friday...CV on monday..rush rush rush..



nice right! lol

you took a piece of my heart
i never thought this could fall apart
you said you fall in love
and this was more than i had been afriad of
another life
another happy ending cuts like a knife
another place another time
another hand to touch
another sun to shine

you got me deeper and deeper
and im constantly blinded
im running around but theres no place to hide
i start to talk in my sleep
our souls are divided
why cant they forgive me these demons inside

deeper and deeper and im constantly blinded
my heart starts to shiver for it was not enough
i start to talk in my sleep
cos our souls are divided
how can it be that you're ready for love

today woke up at 9am..totally late for school..lecture and lecture...sian...and ya...i today go donate blood...actually want grab my friends pei me go together..at least not so scare..but then in the end only i go...lol...wah seh..look at ppl donating blood very painful...when u sit on the chair there waiting for the nurse to poke u...more scared lol...then my turn came...the nurse inject the first needle that make me veins nuumb...wah pain sia tat one...poke into elbow there...then 2nd needle i see wah seh..bigger one..but inject in no feeling lei...ok good..then blood flow into the bag le lo...mine took 20min to fill up the hold thing...the nurse say i drink not enuff water...blood too thick..cannot flow fast..lol..

yea..im so proud...first timer blood donar go alone...im not scare of needles anymore! lol

week 7 coming to an end...next weeek must chiong study le...guess i will have to either work on 1 day or stop working for the next 2 weeks...so going to miss my friends...

i want this i want that! which to get first! shoes shirt jeans jacket speaker?

i need a life

if only

didnt update this few days cos nothing much happen...and abit busy also...ya..just now had steamboat at deshun house..quite a success..cos the usual ppl all came...eat till 10+ then clean up everything 11+ go off le...hope can have another steamboat soon!

yea..blood donation drive is on and i want to go..who want pei me go??!!

payday coming! money start rolling in! yes! i saved 250$ this month! keep it up BY!

yea rena..when wanna go check out dentist stall?? enuff money ma?

omg...right now i should be sleeping cos later 8am needa wake up..but i still alert and awake...wat to do?

all i want for christmas...yea..i know its still long lol

woke up at 7pm..everyone went out for dinner..home alone...sad la..9pm+ then ta bao for me...now going back to sleep again..sianzzz

week 7 is here...i dun like!!

u just have to believe in yourself boy
u got so many looks gal

work was totally bore just now..fav ppl all working at deck...sibei cui..lack of staff...yea..finally l4d2..so dam fun man!! me and kun just chiong only..the map so fun...but the monster also got new one..dangerous..weapons so dam cool...yea..play till 5+...slack at void deck to 7..now doing more research on the shit again...

another weekend burnt...wat havee i done..nothing

win liao...nao 7am and haven sleep..digging the net for fire protection system but found only words..not wat i want..k gonna sleep now...

i wanna count the stars
i wanna watch sunrise
when will that day come

why lei

work at deck today...nothing much happen..yea..working with yulin was fun...requested to go off at 12 cos was feeling tired..24$ gone..slack at pond with amanda till the rest release from work..slack at 401 again..then homed...

i think i see things too simple...thats why i dun get the meaning of everything around me...even simple stuff i also dunno how to interprate...tats sad...its like when something happen and someone ask u..u dunnoe how to say...but then when another person mentions this issue to the same person..then u realise " oh tats wat im trying to say"

give me a reason why i like tat...do i have a 人格分列症?

wat i want

working last night was boring at first...then busy at the end...yea so many staff..10pm releasse alot ppl...nothing much happen...after work drink hoegaarden with kit and naren...talk alot of crap storry till 4am+..send kit home then cab home with naren..

sian going to rain...how how...no mood to work...i hate raining days...

ok...gonna do some reaading again..

this speaker is so dam chio ok! design so unqiue..eyeing on it very long le...harvey norman got display...thinking of getting it for my ipod...

ya...free time at home..did some editing to my blog..yea..finally upload display pic...lol...that pic i taking by myself during fyp de...dam bored then play webcam lol...

stay back in library to do some research on ANOTHER project ,case study on fire safety system in a aircraft...alot sia...need to ownself find system design..how it works..and most important is to understand it...cos we cannot anyhow booms the report as our lecturer works in the aerospace industry before..cannot bluff..in fact most of our lecturers work in aerospace industry before..interesting

sian la..week 8/9 common test..and my study mood is not there..how how how

its going to be a long weekend..hope its going to be fun...yea..working with my fav ppl , l4d2 hopefully , i like!

downloading windows 7 since afternoon..dam it not enough disk space...need del alot stuff..hope windows 7 is better than xp

just pack my room..looks much better now...yea..especially my tutorial lecture and lab sheets...all diff module diff paper all mix together..now its so nice and neat..i like!

realised now its week 6..and common test is like week 8/9? and i haven been listening in lectures...i want to pay attention..but class is really noisy...left right up down all down ppl talking..how to concentrate...i dun even like small whispering...im selfish yes...cos i only want to hear 1 ppl talk..thats why u always see me listening to my ipod sing song lol

ok..gonna spend my time wisely..sleeping time ppl

something in your eyes i know i can't resist
something in the air i don't know why
you were hardly there when i was on my own
theres something about you that makes me cry

can I believe
that your heart still beats for me
let me receive
a sign that you're my destiny.
i wanna know

give me a reason
for me to believe in
cant you see it in my eyes
that i need a reason
for im still breathing
is it time to say goodbye
cos deep in my heart i know
theres a reason
why i am not leaving
why im not alone
so give me a reason
for me to believe in
give me a reason

today nothing much happen..normal day..tml gonna stay in school do case study again..sian..

i always see the good in everyone..yea..maybe i see things in a smaller view tats why..but why 99% of the time i always like tat...i feel no hard feelings when ppl shoot me...problems come i just do the normal procedures...i feel like a cold person with no feelings man...and when 1 day something really bad happen i will fall down very hard on my knees...probably i cry so hard tat day cos my heart tell me to let everything out...心酸阿

ah..hungry again..and i had a super full dinner just now...wats wrong with me!

BIG SORRY to all ytd..didnt know i caused so much trouble...didnt want this to happen...i wont get into that state again...i have made so many ppl dulan me..hope u all accept me apology

ytd work wasnt even like saturday...hai..dam boring...like normal weekday at outdoor...sibei sian..actuallyy sheledule to go off at 12..but got some confusion and misunderstanding and lack of staff...i do till closing..

thanks carson for sending me home last night..ok i sound gay but im not..got drunk and cried and he send me home..sorry to all who cant get home early cos of me..must control next time..

i want l4d2! who want?!

do ur best and god will do the rest

ytd school was ok..last lesson the lab dam pek cek...so hard to do..then me and jun yang dun want do le..go play with the spanner all this lol...he alot idea sia..laugh dam hard...

work was also ok..not much of a crowd..yea...wanted to go off at 12 as kit say kat is coming down and i thought of wanna chat with her since long time no meet..but then kit and me wanna go off..so aiya..i want let kit go since she put 12..but then she dun want me alone..so work to close lo..after work milo ice then homed

and ya! i am so addicted to restaurant city lol..kinda late to play this game..but still its so cute!!!!

cos its too late

today totoally tired...sleep in bus sleep in lecture..only lesson i was alert at ah yap the plane module..lol..so dam cool...our lab is to do aeroplane..fun right..do le can play somemore..but like kid like tat lol...

我要一点爱， 一点就好。

these few days ppl give me comments about me tat made me thought alot..我的心真软，他人说的话我当真。我真傻。我到底是谁？

你越想得到、你越得不到，陈文扬，不要一直想了啦！

我好累啊。如果可以一直high就好。

bbq just now was alright..lucky rain stop...yea...so fun got ah kon around..chef of the day..thnx man! after sing song go home le..tired..happy bday jess again!

time to move on ,陈文扬

caught 2012 just now ..omg i swear its dam nice..so realistic...but coming to think wat if the end of the world is coming..will all this happen..im really scare to think of it after i watch the movie..made me think that i should live up to the moment..dun care wat is the future...treasure ur love ones and friends...do wat u should do now..

ya..so finally this hectic week is over...comm skill presentation over...sar21 submit le...so free! release at 3pm...went to amk hub buy tickets with shin...played the arcade the gundam simulator..wah seh!! dam shiok! dam real..dam expensive lol.....pool with him..wah..not bad sia..can train together...then off to movie..

ok..im so tired now...and ya!! almost forgot..tml need buy buss concession..another 50$ fly off le..sad..and also jess bday bbq yea man!

nobody knowsss

i could sing these all day!

oasis rocks!

ok...wrotten some part of my script..tml meet at school 8am for rehearsal...hope everything goes well for us...and ya..we gonna wear formal whole day..so cool! hope got enough time go home change makan bath then work...

after tml..a piece of rock is of my mind!!

i dunno!

manage to done 50% of slides..still got alot more..now i feel MUCH better than just now...stil got comm skill sai haven done...pressure presure...okay

contentment denial confusion solution
rejection acceptance standing up moving on

where am i dunnoe doesnt mean i dun care

i have lost motivation to do anything...everytime i sit down forcing myself to read the notes and understand it..i stop doing it after 10mins..fuck..and this shit is dued by wed...and fuck..tuesday comm skill presentation and i have not done my own script yet...dun even know my part will be approve by my group anot...so lost right now...maybe is because i have stop touching the book since this march...so long never touch the book everything also forgot how to do...lost the motivation to study..and its only week 5...how am i going to survive the rest of the sem...maybe im just tat fucking lazy...

seriously i got some commitment issues here...damnation

i wish i knew nothing about anything

Today worked at deck all my fav ppl I like! Bao liang layyen jeolyn yen ping...so fun..after work drank talk cock till now then go home..hai..when it comes to some stuff I always avoid and when I come back avoid again..when I will stop this...yea diff ppl see diff things words are misleading..I'm dunno wat I thinking..I need some light in my life..

K gonna continue project again...hopefully tonight bring moi family to bliss makan...hopefully

food runner ytd at work...dam it the gratin so much sauce flow out burn my arm...high sia lol..and stupid rain soak my feet for the whole night...after work makan at 401 then send jeolyn home...thanks for the mug mr hock! lol

just wake up and realise i didnt switch off my laptop lol...last night i reach home bath le then do my work until i fall asleep...lol..no wonder i feel so cold now cos the fan is blowing me thruout the night....but lucky i waake up at 130 cos 2pm need send my friend my research part..heng ah!

ok...gonna spend my afternoon do the sar21 sai...wed deadline i dun want fail...

ytd work shag...got buffet at deck and im keying deck..dam busy...dun want say..some ppl altitude..after work plaza ppoool then home...

gonna spend time wisely..sat morning do cs de stuff and sar21..dam it why like tat..comes to group work always can feel some tension between us....i hate it..

ok...gtg bath makan work..cya all later

only manage to complete 25% of sar21...was dam no mood to do it..laptop next to my only..after a while went back surfing the net...and i made a discovery..loll...itunes got radio de..but is all ang mo country de..but also not bad la..surfing those blogshop..wah alot things so tempting..resist!

guess i will have to continue doing it this weekend...hai..i eat my words back again and again..i dont honour my words...im a big fat liar

tml fri sat work..dam...only left sat afternoon and sunday to do it...i really need a timetable...

i dunno wat to say here..recently all my surrounding the friends all so down..really turn off no life...just say out ur problem...keep it ur heart also very xin ku ma...ga...im feel tat i can help no one..tat why it also sadden me abit..

argh...perhaps this is growing up lol...kat is so true lol..

time to sleep..if only the night is longer...

push me

i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!
i must do 50% of SAR21 by tonight!

someone pls give me some motivation to push me!! im so lazy to move!

headache headache..today first lecture slept thruout the 2hours..dam tired..ah soon also...now back home..later going jogging with nic...like finally lol..

ok damit..teacher extend deadline to next wed...so i must not waste this grace period...aat least tonight DIE DIE MUST draw something out on the stupid majong paper!!


ok i tink i abit overboard...

ok..i think im having USTM lol...everything so easy forget

ok...TIME TO START !!! GOGO!!

so super tired now...after school rush back home makan bath then to work...heng never late...work in deck...ok la..slack slack..talk talk...then closing time as usual cock up alot...somemore have to teach new staff wash toliet...dam busy

think i should pon school tml do sar21?
cos really very tired man
this whole week deprive of sleep
im tired already
what should i do

yea..next wed movie thursday bbq cum jess bday..hope it will be fun..but hope i will complete my stuff by this week first

i feel so lonely...so lonely...i need some company tonight

spend some time reading friends blog...reminds me of those funny moments...yea...i love my clique...they rock!

and dam it...august i buy my ipod touch 388...then last month drop to 308...and guess wat..today nyp got it show selling ipod touch 288!! so heartache la...100$ lei!!...argh!! just let it go...

and happy bday jiawei and safwan! they like bro but diff mum sia...same year same date diff race...happy bday once again!

sometimes..i just want to take a long break from everything..to a place where everything is so pure...no worries no trouble..can take me there?

ok..i shall do some work on comm skill project now!

Work last night was o..help at deck with function...also okay la..requested to go off at 11 as it was getting boring..eated at 401 then homed

Just now I felt so dam stupid la...I wanna take lift to level 5...then I want press door close but then door keep opening...then I thought outside got ppl playing the lift button..I go out see..no ppl lei..I press close button again...still open..then I see carefully the button I pressing is open...LOL..inside the lift some more got 2 ppl.. I hear them laughing at me lo..dam paisei la..but thnking of it still funny la...lol

This week alot things to rush..hope I can finish my stuff...hopefully

Never wanna see you cry cry cry
And I never wanna tell a lie lie lie

Woke up dam early today...later gonna collect ah gong ash from mandai...hope I have enough time to catch some sleep and rush back for work later...my back is killing me!!

Like the cloud you
Drift me away
Faraway
Yea~
And like the sun you
Brighten my day
You brighten my day
Yea~

RIP,ILY

Back from the cremation at mandai...had 1last round of prayers before the coffin is send to mandai...we had to walk 1 last round around the coffin before it is seal...tears just came down and I can't help it..it is the last time we will see him...after the cremation..did alot of stuff..then now back home..super tired!

Today is sat and I'm not working!! How sad..I want to meet up with my friends but really tired and lazy to move!

So now it's over...after this whole thing..I realize I had a better understanding of life..shall not talk more about it...

Rest in peace ah gong...

another tired day...woke up at 12pm instead of 9am...gave tutorial a miss...went for lesson at 2pm...after tat go to funeral...today is dam busy...got do prayers...my nephew dam naughty la...keep jumping up and down...play the joss stick almost burn my niece...wanted to scold him but thought that hes still a small boy..dun understand..nvm lo...

i realise tat when everytime something big happen in a family...always bond us together...just now had a small talk with my 2 elder nephew...although we only like talk to each other everytime i go to amk...we ald talk like long lost brothers...alot random topics...amk de guys very late then got gf de...but i believe tat my love will come in time? random~

today is the last day and later going for cremation...gotta wake up at 7am..better sleep now...

i love all my friends...i will be a stronger boy!

i love u ah gong...i still can hear ur voice in my head...

stuck with each other

nothing much happen today...all very normal...went down to funeral after school...thanks jun yang and lim fung for coming down...really appreciate it...finally did a overview on the sar21 document...was dam tired...went off at 1130...tml lesson 11am..can sleep longer yea...

and dam it..i forgot to do case study on singtel..and i need to show something to my group tml...argh!! gonna rush on it later..

dunnoe why now everytime this time..i always get hungry...like tat i will get fat lo...eat le then go sleep..zz

hope everyone is doing fine in their daily life! cheer up ppl!!

live forever

today school was a bore...lab lab lab..dam piss off with the teacher..keep saying us year 3 engineering student still dunnoe how to use lab equipment...pls la...all the machine all year 2 never learn de lei...somemore all very new functions never see before...1 lab expect us to know how to use everything??

went to the funeral after school...saw my ah gong lying in the coffin...so peacefully...i could stand there for 10mins looking at him...its just so peaceful...i hope he will find a better place in the other world...

yea..after awhile i was getting dam sleepy as there was nothing to do there but to fold the paper...shall bring my sar21 notes there to read there tml...

finally thanks ppl for ur concern...i never felt so down in my life till tat day...i think we should really show how much we love each other before its too late...nothing can be done if someone is gonna leave for good...i should really find my purpose to live...yea..i know..blah blah and my rants

this song..delicate to my ah gong...u will live in our hearts forever

maybe
i dont really wanna know
how your garden grows
cos i just wanna fly
lately
did you ever feel the pain
in the morning rain
as it soaks u to the bone

maybe i just wanna fly
i wanna live i dont wanna die
maybe i just wanna breathe
maybe i just dont believe
maybe you're the same as me
we see things they'll never see
you and i gonna live forever

Ytd was full of emotions...after school I decided to visit my ah gong since it was early...then around 5 left for work...on my way home a blind man ask me if whether I can help him...I wanted to help..but told him I'm in a rush to work...really feel bad leaving him walking on his own..but there's nothing I can do...I'm so sorry

Back to work payday..was super dam happy as I had 700+ this month... Was smiling all the time during work..working with ruth so fun..can talk crap...she wanted to go off early since she do opening...I don't mind doing all the way..then around 930 I recieve bad news from my mum...my ah gong just passed away..I cannot believe it...he was still fine the afternoon when I visit him..why now like tat..my mum tell me to go home..so I requested to go off at 10...

He has work hard his whole life..he now needs a good long rest..rest in peace ah gong

finally done my comm skill...a load of my mind...anyway..today i woke up at 530...nothing to do...cooked noodles to eat...feel like going out makan and to bliss for hoegaarden..but was lazy to move..

read a post by my friend and she said "born to die, force to live" maybe tats wat life is all about...its simple...argh i need to get out!

this week i think is going to be a busyy week...human factor module need to submit a 50 page silde DRAFT by next week!! gona spend this week study sar21 document...80+ pages long sia..

and also i will try my best this week to go visit my ah gong if i have time...my mum say today she go visit him he is skinnier than the last time we went...really so heartache to think of that

tues thurs fri work...all 7pm...hope i have time to go according to my plans...

and steamboat seession...sad thing...maybe next time...i try to figure out something big...old bliss clique..+ new bliss clique ( edwin's gang)

movie movie i wanna watch MJ this is it and jeniffer body..tml or wed night anyone? at amk hub..and next week 2012 also out...so looking forward to it

ok..gonna sleep now..sleepy again.

fish n chip

didnt update these few days as quite busy with work...thursday work was alrite...nothing much...friday was super slack...dam rain plus making me work in deck key worsen my dam flu...

updates on schools..project are like more than my fingers and i dun even bother to keep track of wats coming in...i need someone to scold me or remind me to do someting about it!..CS HF AOP...and 1 or 2 more module i think

today work was better than friday..but still dam rain ruin everything...going out with them is so fun..we talk about how to talk in a monster tone..."thank you for your attention"...in monster tone naren say " fuck you for your attention"..lol la..."bye bye" become "chee bye" lol..still got alot i dun want so vulgar le.naren and kit did a good job to do some entertainment..best...i didnt wear my mask as i expected...painted my face and wear the witch hat...yea..and that BP wear it..eee..time pass quite slow..had alot games...drinking game best....took alot photos...who gonna fb them?? i want i want..

was disapointed just now as i thought they will open indoor for us to eat drink talk like last time xmas..since they said it was a party and celebration..instead it was like eat n go session...everyone eat le then go le..really so no mood and demoralise...and to add on...i think i have to cancel this coming sat steamboat...the doc say my ah gong case....can only make it for 2 weeks or this month...i knew the truth have to come...the truth always is like tat...wat can i do...im really lost for actions..i need someone to confort me so badly right now...

boring day in school...yea..for the first time this sem..i was listening to lecture this morning! but only 1hour la lol..another hour slack..

now in lab doing practical...2 hours lab i 1 hour complete le...then later 4-5 is e learning...tonight work 7..dun feel like going e learning lei..but must go for attendance..bobian..

i think i going to buy some stuff for sat de halloween..like vampire teeth or wat...who wanna come?

and also i have a sudden crave to nfs!! i delete nfs carbon last time now i regret..zz

and to rena recent post...i think i feel the same as u..i try to be nice all the time...but life is like tat de..hao ren always die de..but it is better to be hao ren than huai ren? the society is like the wild..got prey and predator...there will be over population if there is too much prey or predator...only hao ren will be remember when they do something wrong cos they are hao ren...i feel so left out...arrr..but dun think too much...cos it will do no good..just forgive and forget...

I think I'm hot and cold...yea sometimes very tired next moment full of enerrgy...duno why..body spoiled? And I have a bad news...I cannot sit and reach lol...I cannot bend down sia...try to bend very pain...siao liao la..napfa how to pass like tat..

But the truth is I really got alot problem with my body..I duno how to face it..if dun cure now then when I old will get worst..wat to do

Aiya enouugh whinning...got another idea le..jinyu one lo l4d de..I want be hunter...but only 1 hoodie...anyone can be hunter lol..maybe put some vampire teeth or wat

Ok dinner time!! My fav lotus soup!!!

goodnight

today school was ok lu...dun have NE..release at 4...meeted jeolyn naren at kopitiam makaan..then went to bliss and slack...new handshake! i dunnoe how to swim la..dun laugh at me..naren went off at 8..then we slack drink talk..hoegaarden dam nice..yea..alot gossip + heart talk...i like!...back home now

tml lesson at 9..some sort of seminar 3-5...bored...i think i got alot project piling up..and i didnt like keep a record of all the projects...like due when...all these..i need to be more organised!

ok currently rena soon celestine layyen jess kit naren ricky jinyu amanda kat yulin confirm coming...i think i wanna buy cake surprise my mum...should i buy from bliss cos the cake looks nice?

and and and also...this sat have to dress up for halloween...how sia...dress up as something scary??..or gothic ghostly watever..i cant do tat man...at the most most extreme i only can wear something obscene..see how others wear la tat day...and thnx for the ride back hock!